This week, I started down an incredible new journey. It’s going to be difficult, stressful, and expensive, but in hoping for the best.
No, I did not buy a new show horse.
I made an investment in myself and I hope that it was the right choice and it will be something I’ll be able to do successfully.
When I was young, all I wanted to do was be a vet – for the very narrow minded reason that “I love animals” especially horses so I want to become an equine vet. Sciences always came fairly naturally to me, I usually passed with flying colors. Not straight A’s, but strong grades all the same.
Eventually as I got older, closer to college searching age, I lost that desire. Already by the age of 16, trying to work at McDonald’s and buy a car, I did learn pretty quickly that expensive things are expensive and college, especially 7 years of veterinary school was very expensive.
All the same, my Dad pushed me (aggressively even) to go to college and get a degree.
Amongst many other factors going on in my life at 17ish, I had no direction or self worth at all. None.
“Dad, what do you think I’m good at?”
“I don’t know,” he said. ” You need to go to college and find out for yourself, even if you take basket weaving, I don’t care. You’re going to college.”
Those uninspiring words at that fragile time when I was at my lowest mental wellness I had ever been at that point in my life, did not stir me into college.
Oh I looked. And I decided I wanted to ride horses. I found a college that actually was a riding college… The whole degree was an equine sciences degree.
When my Dad asked what I can do with the 2 year degree, I honestly said I have no idea. Manage a barn maybe? Work at a race track? Who knew. When my dad saw the cost he flat out said no.
So, the one college I picked, for the vague career plans I didn’t have, was shot down. After highschool, I did enroll per my Dad’s ultimatum into our state college. 3 months later, I dropped out.
I didn’t hate college; I was always good in school. I just had no clue what to do with myself in life and didn’t think I was going to figure it out sitting in a classroom. I wanted to ride professionally and pursue that.
Every horse show I then went to, my Dad asked me how much money I was earning. How was I going to support myself? I had no idea, and I certainly wasn’t winning money.
So, eventually, I settled on a college path that would allow me to be a professional and a horse person, but not in a riding capacity.
At 20 years of age, I re-enrolled into Veterinary Technology at a local 2 year college and after graduation, I went on to be a vet tech at a mixed animal practice.
After 2 years, and a very long road, I moved across the country to be a tech at an all equine veterinary practice. I got out of my Dad’s house, I had my degree, and I was going to finally be able to support myself and my horses as a vet tech. Right?
Let’s suffice to say that none of that happened. While I did remain an equine vet tech for 6 more years, to keep a long, horrible story short, it was not the career path for me.
That was so many years ago now, it’s hard to believe where my life has taken me. It’s been a very very very long road. If I detailed it, this post would probably break the Worspress site….
So last year, I started a new job. While searching for a new job, I found a lot of very well paid jobs I could totally do based purely on over 20 years experience. Manager level type jobs, overseeing efficiently run business matters. I applied to all of them every time. $100,000 a year? Heck yea, I can do this job!
The only qualification I lacked…. Was a Bachelor’s degree in a business field. I never got a single response from any of those upper level positions despite my strong case for my experience which I emphasized repeatedly in my cover letter.
So, when I did land an amazing new job (not in a management position) at an awesome new company, one of the first things I asked my recruiter before I even interviewed was….. Does your company offer tuition assistance?
Like when I was 18, I still had no way to pay for college 25 years later, but I wanted to get that missing degree to open up my future to one of those high paying jobs I am already capable of.
The recruiter said yes, and I was thrilled. But it didn’t kick in as a benefit for a year.
That year mark passed last month, and I had submitted my request for approval for tuition assistance, and applied to my State’s University.
As of this week, at a ripe old age, this old somewhat broken down hag, is a college student.
It is fully online, at my pace, and while it’s not quite what I was expecting, I am thrilled to be in college.
When I was younger, I barely studied, I didn’t care to double check my work, I knew it would be right. I handed in assignments without giving them a second thought. And I was always on the honor roll getting A’s, maintaining a high GPA. School at that time was easy, or I didn’t care enough to bother.
The decades of damage to my self confidence and years of anxiety and worry now has totally undeniably changed my carefree attitude. I’m completely stressed and totally worried I might fail.
I’ve been in college officially 4 days, already handed in my first assignment wich I’m stressed about the grade, and already wrote an essay, which I’ve reached out to the school’s tutors to help me make sure it is done right.
This is not going to be an easy adventure…… Fingers crossed that pass.
I don’t care about Honors or Straight A’s, I just want to do well, pass and in 3-5 more years land that upper level job thwiat ll actually help me build a retirement.
Oh boy, what have I gotten myself in to??
Life in 2024 